Mother's Day 2023
Discussion & Practice
- Read Psalm 77. What is a difficult circumstance God has brought you through recently, or that you’re going through right now? How have you seen God’s faithfulness in it?
- What does surrender look like in the midst of suffering? What specifically could you be called to surrender?
- Who has provided an example for you of strong faith in the midst of trials?
- In what ways does gratitude counter feelings of despair?
- How can you be truly grateful in the midst of despair?
Practice: Write out your own story of a difficult time God has brought you through. What are some signs of his faithfulness throughout? Looking back, what are some signs of his faithfulness that you can see now that you couldn’t see then? If you’re currently going through a trial, try writing out your own Psalm of lament with Psalm 77 as a guide.
Notes
I’m humbled to get to share my story today and how God has worked and continued to work in my life.
I’m not special at all, and my story is not very special. While I’ll be talking about experiences in my life, the story is not about me but about God. It’s about the lessons he’s taught me. I pray you hear his good news and how he’s available to do great things in our lives when we get out of the way of his purposes.
I’ve titled my message The Goodness of God. There were times in my 74 years that I had a hard time believing that the Lord is good. Mother’s Day has both a happy and also a sad side of the coin.
Today, if you find yourself in doubt and despair, I hope you find hope.
When Phil and I married, we were a blended family and there were 7 of us. In the early days of our marriage, we weren’t Christians, but took our kids to church. I was removed from the reality of a Savior who died for my sins and loved me unconditionally. I had not understood grace or surrendered my life.
We began to associate with people who were strong believers and God began to change who we were. We were hungry for God’s truth. Phil’s son Brad was attending Mid-Cities church in Bedford where Pete was the youth pastor and Gail was singing.
We began to understand the good news of the gospel and that even sinners like us were loved by God. We were forgiven through God’s overwhelming grace.
When it was announced that Pete and Gail were going to plant a church, we felt God leading us to join them. In the early days, we were faithful partners in the church and I sang on the praise team. Phil would purchase donuts and measure church attendance by how many donuts he would have to buy. My son Jason played and continues to play drums.
Phil and I were growing in our faith and belief. We were feeling blessed and thanking God for his exceeding blessings. I thought I had surrendered control of my life to him.
Life is a journey from mountain to mountain with deep valleys between. A mountaintop experience was when my granddaughter was born. We surrounded my daughter when she decided to keep the baby and continue with the pregnancy. Phil and I knew there would be challenges, but we invited her to come live with us. I couldn’t praise God loud enough for his protection. But then, 2 years, 9 months, and 6 days after Kyla’s birth we got a call that she was unresponsive. We lost her. No reason was found for her death.
Nothing can prepare you for that kind of tragedy, especially if you think you’re controlling your life. My anger was legendary. I didn’t want to hear Phil talk about heaven. I felt like the psalmist in Psalm 77.
I could not be comforted and began to pour my heart into poems. I was raging against a God who I thought was uncaring and unfaithful. But God was with me in the writing, even when I didn’t want him to be.
As I wrote all that bile on the pages, I ended every poem by praising God for Kyla’s life. I knew the only way I would begin to live again would be to stay in Scripture. I meditated on his truth.
As I read the Psalms, I remembered God’s goodness in my life and how he stayed with me even when I didn’t want his presence. I thanked him for the miracles in my life.
Slowly, like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 turns the lament into praise, I began to pray for a great wonder to be worked in me. I prayed for a heart of surrender. But my pride and self-reliance made it hard to give up control to Christ. I believed if I prayed hard enough I could save us from drowning.
Soon God would show me what true surrender looks like and what it means to live under his authority.
In the coming years, more kids were born and we continued to grow in our faith.
In 2013, another experience happened when one of my grandsons had a virus and was transferred to Cooks with a 50/50 chance for survival. But my son and daughter-in-law’s reaction was, “He is not ours, mom. God loaned him to us. We are trusting God either way.”
God showed me what true surrender looked like.
This time, I did not scream at God, but read Scripture after Scripture of God’s assurance and that his glory would be seen whatever the outcome. I opened my hands and relinquished control. God turned my hope from control to surrender and from fear to gratitude. Today, he is celebrating his 11th birthday.
We were being blessed by God and living in his love.
Later, Phil’s son Brad died suddenly from cardiac arrest at age 48. It was a shock. As Phil and I clung to one another in grief and disbelief, I found I was not standing on a shaky foundation of faith, but one in the bedrock of God’s love and mercy. I leaned into God and let his loving hand cover me.
I didn’t spend a lot of time asking why this time. The question is not really, “Why me?” But “Why not me?”
We don’t get to choose the way our lives are going to go. The only saving is done by God. Brad’s death is heartbreaking. But God had changed my attitude and heart. And even when I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, I know who is in charge, I trust him, and I trust his plan. And I know I’ll see him again in heaven.
My life story is the story God has given me. I’m grateful for every day he allows me to be on earth.
Every one of you has your own story of joy and grief. When we’re in the deepest valleys it’s hard to imagine we could have another mountaintop experience.
I want to share three things about God’s goodness:
Release your life to God and his good will. When it’s hard to open your fist, just raise it to God in praise, because it’s really hard to praise God while keeping your fists closed.
Write down all his good works you’ve seen in your life.
Through all the trials and joys and blessings of my life, I’ve found God is good, trustworthy, faithful, and sufficient.
Life has its ups and downs. Jesus told us it would be like this. He said we would have trouble, but that he has overcome the world.
I’m going to leave you with my favorite Bible verse in some dark days.
Pete’s close:
It’s very possible right now in your life you need to be strong for someone else. That’s a hard burden to bear.
When you look at a person who has carried a lot of weight, it gives you hope that it can be done. There will be people in your life when you stay close in community to others that will be there when the bottom falls out. Donna is one of those people.
I have a strong mother, strong to this day. For many ladies in this room, a lot of people are depending on you and I know you feel it. Surrender to God and trust in him.